The SHOCK of your life

Right now it's 6:51 in the morning. As everyone else in the normal world is getting up for another workday, I am updating my blog before going to bed. I'm not sure what I'm going to do tomorrow, since it is my first of three days off. I was thinking of going to an hour long defensive tactics training class... and then maybe going for a 2-3 mile jog. After that, I would probably round out the workout with 8-minute abs and 8-minute arms. Don't laugh! Ya, I know those 8-minute workout videos are so "old school". But wow, do they burn.

Speaking of burning, today... well, I guess it was actually yesterday... I had my taser certification. Yep, that means I got to "ride the lighting" or as others say, "ride the buffalo". So, after my brief two second nightmare with 50,000 volts coursing through my body, I have come up with three conclusion. ONE: Ouch! TWO: If anyone ever points one of those things at me, I will shoot them right where they stand. THREE: I will never volunteer to have that done to me again.

It is very hard to explain what it feels like. The device is actually made to disturb both the sensory and muscular nerves. It creates arcs, disturbing those nerves, at an extreme rate, which basically renders your entire body useless. For my "ride", I was on my knees with two other officers holding each arm to break my fall. The instructor told me to try and stand up. As I started to get up, I knew it was coming, but that didn't help. Immediately my body tensed, my head jerked back and apparently, I made a pitiful grown. My right knee buckled and the left leg went intensely straight. I would have fallen to the ground had it not been for the two officers holding me up. I remember this intense pain and wishing that it would stop. Hard to believe it barely lasted two seconds. The only good news is, unlike pepper spray, it has no lasting effects.

So here is a great clip of a taser deployment. I can't believe this guy. He continues to argue, and each time gets to enjoy a little more of that tingly feeling. If it were me... well, I would have done anything the trooper wanted after the first five second ride.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gzTUQ1afSF8